What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
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