you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
How's work?
Spinning.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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