I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
