Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
