That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
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