it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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