you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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