I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
