i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
