I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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