We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
