Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Randomize
