I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
