nut hugger
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
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