He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Randomize
