if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
