sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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