got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
