Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize