I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
