Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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