You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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