You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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