me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Randomize
