Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize