i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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