ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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