how can u be prego again
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
