at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i need an iv and a liver transplant
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Randomize
