There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
