woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Randomize
