"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
