Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
I'm at about main and main street
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I need moral support for this bender
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
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