Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
