I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize
