we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
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