Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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