it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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