How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
Randomize
