I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
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