So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize