Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
