so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
