That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
Randomize
