Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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