We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Randomize
