walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Who died my cat blue again?
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