it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
