so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
