making cat noises will not fix the situation.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
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